Lucky Number Slevin (aka The Cincinnati Kid)

I've been keeping this journal for the past several weeks as we started the journey with Eby Baby #4....again.


May 4, 2012
3w, 5d

Need I say more? So apparently I'm as fertile as they come. Just a few weeks after my most recent miscarriage we are pregnant again, the 7th time to be exact. As of now I'm just in shock. We really weren't "trying" this time, granted we weren't trying not to either. So far I'm already feeling nauseous, tired, and have serious pregnancy brain. I've already called the doctors office and am scheduled for a confirmation of pregnancy appointment on May 21st and they will call me Monday once they get the doctor's permission to have me come in for betas/progesterone testing. I'm now just trying to take it all in and just relax.

I had had a feeling that I might be pregnant when a couple of days ago I really noticed being dehydrated and feeling like I needed water immediately and haven't stopped drinking it since. And then for the past few days I've had some serious moments of feeling sick so today I decided to get a test and see. Now its just waiting to make sure everything is A-OK.

My initial instincts are telling me girl, but it might just be so I don't get my hopes up about a boy. I have always thought I would have 3 boys and I really do long for another boy. Don't get me wrong, I will be happy with a girl, all I really want is healthy and happy. I'm due somewhere around January 14th, different calculators have given me the 13th, 14th, and 15th so I guess I'll just stick with the middle date. The Ancient Chinese Gender chart says girl and so far it has said girl for Jake and Brenden and boy for Rylan. So who knows, that's still so far away and we still have a lot of hurdles to jump through before we can really think about that, but I'm sure I'll still obsess over it until I know for sure though :)

For now, we'll just think positive and have happy thoughts!

May 7, 2012

4w, 1d

So I've tested for 3 days in a row to see if the line is getting darker, my 3rd world version of Hcg testing. And it looks good to me! (At least that's what I'm hoping) I haven't heard back from the Doctor's office yet, but I just put in another call to see if they want me to come in for blood work. I don't mean to be a pest, but with my history I'm freaking a little and would like to have my levels tested ASAP for some peace of mind, no matter what the results. I just want to know. I've still been feeling quite crappy and I'm hoping that's a good sign, but until I get some scientific, from the doctor confirmation I know I'm going to be weary. Hopefully they'll call me back soon and I'll be able to get tested today or tomorrow. Fingers crossed and positive thoughts!

May 8, 2012
4w, 2d

Got the word from the Doctor yesterday that I could be tested and of course I was there an hour later. At 4pm today I finally got word back from the receptionist that my Hcg level was 202 and my Progesterone was 39. The Hcg is in the normal range for 4 weeks and the progesterone is nice and high, from what I have read it should be between 9 and 47. So I'm feeling a bit of relief, especially because I had a nightmare last night about a miscarriage and today I didn't feel as sick. I should be getting tested again tomorrow to see if the levels are doubling as they should be and tonight after dinner I thought I was going to be sick, a few more things that should keep my mind at ease. I'm pretty sure the next 2 months are going to feel like an eternity for me. Positive thoughts!

May 10, 2012
4w, 4d


Hcg level 464 - Wooooooooo Hooooooooooo! It doubled! I'm still nervous and I have a LOT of anxiety, but hearing that the levels doubled as they should is good news and it helps. The doctor has ordered for me to have an ultrasound at my first appointment. In order to get me in for the ultrasound and the appointment at the same time we moved my appointment to May 23rd, only 2 days later so I shouldn't freak too much :) I have butterflies in my stomach, things are good :) More Positive thoughts!

May 14, 2012
5w, 1d


I thought I would put up a belly picture - a little nicer than looking at my pee sticks ;) It doesn't look too bad in the picture, but when I look down it looks huge to me. I know its mainly just bloating, but its comforting to see it growing so soon :)

May 23, 2012

6w, 3d

Ultrasound day....I was very excited and VERY nervous. But it seems it was all for nothing :) We got a heartbeat and the baby measured at 6w, 2d. Since this pregnancy is directly after a miscarriage we didn't know for sure what the EDD was because I hadn't had a period yet (sorry if TMI) so the ultrasound was in part to have an accurate Due Date as well as check for viability. 6w, 2d puts me at a January 14th due date, which is what I had had initially. Even though this is all VERY good news I'm still an emotional wreck. With the pregnancy last fall I saw the baby at 8w, 1d  on an ultrasound so I know that a heartbeat is no guarantee that this pregnancy will make it. I'm still trying my best to think positively and the Doctor is being very considerate and having me back in 2 weeks to have a quick peak ultrasound and then back 2 weeks after that for fetal heartbeat without ultrasound. I think I can make it 2 weeks until the next appointment, I'm sure I'll still be anxiety ridden until then, but its better than waiting 4 weeks like what would normally happen, YAY for nice Doctors!

And here's my lovely belly pic:

The boobs are growing and I'm just looking really fat/bloated right now. This is by far the biggest I've looked this early, but I suppose that's what happens when you've been pregnant this many times. The past couple of days I've started feeling a lot more queasy and I've had an acid taste at the back of my throat almost constantly. This has been the most unique pregnancy by far, it has a few bits and pieces that I've gone through before, but for the most part it has been a lot of new stuff. I have absolutely NO IDEA if its a boy or girl. With Jake I was sure from the beginning, Brenden took me at least a month before I was sure, and Rylan I was in denial about - I had swore she was a boy and refused to believe the dream I had had that said otherwise and my symptoms were completely different from the boys. My symptoms are all over the place in terms of what I had with the boys and what I had with Rylan. I guess I'll just have keep in tune with my body and if I don't get any clear signs one way or the other I'll find out around 20 weeks at the big Ultrasound. Until then, positive thoughts!

June 4, 2012

8w, 1d

So I had some spotting over the weekend. It was really hardly anything and I probably wouldn't have thought anything of it had I not gone through the miscarriage in January. I was originally scheduled to go back to the doctor this Wednesday, but I called them this morning to see if they could get me in any earlier. Since Saturday night I haven't been able to relax or sleep or keep my mind from going to the worst case scenario. Fortunately they were able to get me in this afternoon and the Ultrasound tech was able to do a super quick look to see the heartbeat. Unfortunately, since it was a super quick look we couldn't listen or really see much of anything, just that there was a heartbeat. I really am happy that they got me in and that they were able to see the heartbeat again, but its so hard to find any piece of mind. The doctor just kept telling me that it was good that there was a heartbeat and that now my risk is down to 5% for a miscarriage....Well, I've already been in that 5% this year so it really doesn't make me feel any better. I don't want to get my hopes up because last time that I thought everything was good it wasn't and it was one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with, I'm still not over it and I probably never will be....Seeing the heartbeat should give me a sense of joy and relief, but instead all I can think is what if it all goes wrong again? Even if this pregnancy goes smoothly with no problems I think I will always be a little afraid until delivery. Its hard to imagine that the best case scenario right now is another 30 weeks of anxiety and worry, but I'll take it over the worst case scenario any day.

So now we wait for another 2 weeks to go back. At that point we should hopefully be able to hear the heartbeat on the doppler. Until then I will do my best to be positive.

June 6, 2012

8w, 3d

I hadn't put a belly picture on for a couple of weeks so here it is:

A lot of the bloated stuff has gone away and now its just belly. I'm feeling pretty good as long as I keep food in me, but I'm not sleeping. At all. I find myself up until 2am a lot of nights, I'm sure its anxiety and not being able to quiet my brain down. I've tried Tylenol PM, but no luck and then I just feel really groggy the next morning. I'm hoping the doctor will be able to prescribe something like Ambien at my next appointment because I have GOT to start sleeping. Hopefully once we make it to the 2nd trimester I'll be able to relax a little more as well, but as I said before I think this anxiety is here to stay.

As for the boy or girl thoughts. When I was at the doctor's office Monday I had a vision of my giant pregnant belly and seeing the baby wiggle around and I just got a very strong boy vibe. I've found myself saying "he" or "him" when I'm thinking or talking to myself so I guess my instincts are boy - for the moment at least. Also, my pregnancy symptoms lately have been tending toward what I had with Jake and Brenden more than with Rylan. But as I learned with Rylan, you just never know. Happy and Positive thoughts no matter what it is!

June 18, 2012
10w, 1d

Lookin' about the same and feeling that way to. I think the belly has started to slow down a bit as most/all of the bloating seems to be gone. I had a doctor's appointment today and liked this doctor MUCH better than the last one. It turns out he is from Adrian and went to undergrad at U of M and med school at MSU so that was a nice little extra. And I told him about all of my anxiety and not sleeping and he told me I could come in as much as I wanted to check the fetal heart rate - I'll be going back in one week to take him up on this! He also suggested Benadryl for my allergy problems and sleep problems so tomorrow I'll buy some and give it a try, it can't possibly be any worse than what I've been dealing with now. We were able to find the heart beat on the doppler today - he checked twice to be certain it was baby and not me. The heart rate was 163 bpm and the little guy/girl seemed to be moving around a bit. I came away feeling MUCH better after this appointment. I'm sure the fact that I've made it past 9 weeks is part of that and this new doctor certainly helped as well. So I'll go back next week for a heart beat check and then on July 5th I'll have an ultrasound for a prenatal screening. And the next week I will be in my 14th week and on to the 2nd trimester. It still has felt like it has taken an eternity to get to this point, but its nice to feel like the next step is in sight. More positive thoughts!

June 26, 20120

11w, 2d

Another good doctors appointment yesterday. I saw another doctor again this time and liked her well enough. She was able to find the heart beat fairly easily. My heart did skip a beat when she started on the right side with no luck, but as soon as she switched over to the left side she found it immediately, 160 bpm and strong :) We decided that if the appointment went well then we would let the kids know. So while eating dinner we let the boys know (and Rylan, but really how much does a 22 month old understand/care?). And the boys were thrilled! They threw their hands in the air and cheered. We explained that this would mean Rylan would be sharing a room with Brenden for a bit and he didn't even care. He actually said that he has been lonely and would even share with the baby :) And of course Jake was happy that he would get to keep his room to himself. And Rylan always tries to get in the bottom bunk in Brenden's room so I don't think she'll mind too much, at least I hope so! Jake did ask what if this baby dies and we explained that that would be very sad, but we had waited to tell them until we felt good that this baby would make it and we wouldn't have to worry about that as much. It breaks my heart that the losses we have experienced have really affected Jake too, he's definitely our sensitive one. 

Next week I have an early screening that should include an ultrasound and if all goes well we will start sharing the news with everyone. Until then, happy and positive thoughts!

July 5, 2012

12w, 4d

Well I had my early screen today and everything looked great. The screen does an ultrasound to measure the fat behind the babies neck and compares that measurement to blood they take from me to see the risk of such things as Down Syndrome. I never had this done with the other kids, but since it's been bumpy year I thought I would get all the information I could with this one and it gave me the opportunity to have another ultrasound to see the little guy/girl. 

The doctor and ultrasound tech said the measurement was great and likely when they get my blood work back in a few days that I will have a low risk.The tech was able to get a lot of good images and the baby measured 13 weeks, 3 days ahead of the EDD. It was such a relief to see the baby moving around and I even had tears in my eyes throughout the ultrasound. It is a happy day.